Fall is Around the Corner

ZOELAB DAY 38

I’ve got nothing.

This is the first time since starting this blog that I really don’t have anything.

I don’t want to connect, I don’t want to share, I don’t want to think. I don’t feel inspired. I don’t have anything to say.

What can I do, but admit the truth. {magically, admitting the truth releases it from my grasp.}

This reminds me of the lyrics to a song. I have never titled it, but I think I will now name it “your song.” Several years ago Lucas wrote a very beautiful song on the guitar, and then he taught it to me. It’s very fun to play--all two string chords. Then I wrote lyrics for it. It was very difficult for me. It was the first and only time (so far) I have written lyrics to someone else’s song.

Your Song

I keep playing but the words don’t come.

I sit here and pray for inspiration.

I don’t have anything to say.

Can you still feel the vibrations of my brain?

Then you came along,

with your song,

and it feels so sweet,

yet incomplete.

I’m gonna overheat.

You are California grown,

and like an avocado,

you turn brown when left around.
I once lived in Ohio.

And then, you came along

With your song.

And it feels so sweet,

yet incomplete.

I’m gonna overheat.

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I noticed that on the days I spend most of the time being a mommy, I am less able to be linear here.

I also noticed that I seem to be inadvertently designing record covers lately. Doesn’t today’s look like a record cover?

I asked Emilio today, if could he have any pet in the world, what kind of pet would he have. And he said: “a mouse.” I found that funny, because we already have a pair of mice living with us. And they are very tiny and very cute, with very large black eyes. I got a photo of one tonight checking out our tangle of computer cables.

I just can’t stand the thought of killing them, and yet, they bring the potential for disease into our home. And they keep shredding up our toilet paper to use for nests. I bought some glue traps, but I couldn’t bring myself to set them up yet. I witnessed Lucas kill mice before. Once he shot one point blank in the forehead with an air rifle. Another time, he killed one with a fly swatter. Yes, they are that defenseless.

Oh yeah, and fall is just around the corner. The nights have cooled down. I am wearing pants for the first time in months. The air is crisper, the sunlight is even crisper. Emilio started playing outside again. But still, the bugs remain.

Emilio said to us today: “Hello, how are you? How was your summer?”